Bananas

This week has been a real week of Bananas.

Little tiny bananas...

Normal sized bananas...

Big massive bananas..

and horrible ooozy brown bananas...

With all these bananas kicking about (the reason I've got so many bananas is cos I bought some bananas and then I forgot I'd bought some and bought some more (a bit like the sausages of 2010)) I decided to bake some banana based products.

Banana and Chocolate cake

I decided to make this cake on a whim, I didn't really have a recipe to base it on, I just knew I had lots of bananas and that I wanted to use my whisk, and it was a colleagues birthday. It turned out to be the best cake I've ever made. Not modest - but true!

You will need

3 bananas - the browner the better
170g of self raising flour
170g caster sugar (With this I realised I didn't have enough caster sugar half way through so I went to put in some brown (muscovado?) sugar I found at the back of my cupboard but it had been there so long as I tipped the pot up it all fell into the mixture in on big chunk so I had to scoop some out with my bare hands, so in fact I don't know how much sugar I put in, I'd say probs about 217 grams)
2 eggs
170grams of butter
half a big chocolate bar broken up into chunks

How to make it:
Put everything into a bowl (except the chocolate) and whisk it up! Once whisked stir in the chocolate and put into a cake tin then bake for 1 hour and ten mins on 180.

I wish I still had this cake to eat.

When other people began to hear about my excess of bananas other recipes were suggested to me.

This one is called

Banana, museli and oat muffins

These are slightly more complicated that putting everything into a bowl and whisking it up but just as delicious (nearly) so perservere. I must credit a lovely lady called Helen for the recipe who also likes riding her bike.

This recipe should make around 20 muffins.
300 g self raising flour
1 tsp bicarb
100g of any type of sugar (I used the brown sugar that fell into the bowl in the above recipe, not the stuff I took back out the bowl it was just from the same bag)
50 g porridge oats, plus 1 tbsp for topping
1tsp cinnamon or a bit more if you want as cinnamon is super tasty (and good for fat burning)
3 bananas - the browner the better
1 mug of half museli, half sultanas
280ml milk with a splash of lemon juice in it
5 tbsp olive oil
2 egg whites. (Someone to whom I gave this recipe insisted that they'd never seen eggs in a muffin recipe so stubbornly left them out - their muffins were NOT NICE)

Tip the flour and bicarb into a large bowl.
Put1 tbsp of the sugar in a separate cup all by itself then mix remainder of the sugar with the flour and 50g oats, add the cinnamon and make a hole in the centre.
In a separate bowl, mash the bananas until they look like baby sick

 Stir in the milk, oil and egg whites into the mashed banana until evenly combined.

Then pour the liquid mix into the hole and stir quickly and sparingly with a wooden spoon. We got 3 new wooden spoons for Christmas - what a treat!

The mix will look lumpy and may have the odd fleck of flour, but dont' be tempted to over mix. (Helen's top tip there)

Chuck in the museli and raisins and give it one more stir.

Then divide mix into muffin cases and sprinkle tops with porridge oats and the sugar that you put in the cup all by itslef before.  Bake for 18 - 20 mins or until risen and dark golden.

Here is a story which I remembered at the beginning of the week and has been making me laugh ever since.

On a french exchange trip whilst at school (when none of us could speak any French) a good friend of mine (who still can't speak any French) stayed with a family (to whom she could speak no French).

One evening to avoid the family she decided to have a bath. She ran a lovely deep bath and relaxed in it for a good while.
On getting out the bath and going to empty it, she realised that she couldn't get the plug out.
By this time she'd already been in the bathroom a fair while so the family were starting to puzzle.
As she could speak no French and was a little scared of the family she didn't want to go out the bathroom to ask them how to remove the plug. She hastily scoured the bathroom for a tool with which to empty the bath but found nothing.

In desperation she took the top off the mouthwash bottle and emptied the entire bath into the sink with it.
Hahahahaaa.

Crimbletide

Crimbly Wimbly

I had a super duper lovely Christmas.

It looked like this...

and this...

(this was an actual slate that had fallen off the roof)








and this....

and this...

on this was placed 2 Gressingham Roast Ducks - YUMYUM.

oh, and this....

Over the Christmas period (haha period) I was lucky enough to be cooked for most days. However I am now back home and have started baking once again with a vengeance. 

For Crimbletron I was given some weighing scales, cookery books, a camembert holder, an apron, a whisk (the whisk has changed my life) a cake tin and a bright red tellingbone! That's not for cooking with I'm just so happy with it I wanted to put it on the list.

So a couple of days ago I put them all to the test and made....

Seriously Chocolately Chocolate Brownies

This recipe is taken from The Great British Book of Baking but adapted to accommodate tastes and my boyfriend's nut allergy. Although recently he has decided to sit in a room all week and eat nothing but nuts (and bananas and kiwis - he's allergic to those too) in order to try and overcome it.

You will need...

225grams of butter - it says unsalted but I used clover, it had a few little old toast crumbs in it but didn't seem to matter! 

100grams of chocolate, broken up - I used a mixture of Tesco's basics milk choc and hotel chocolat milk,white and dark slab.

200g caster sugar

4 eggs (use happy eggs if you want - they're so happy!)

1/2 teaspoon of vanilla extract

500g plain flour

50g cocoa

Some white chocolate (broken up into little chunks)

Heat the oven up first to 180, also if your heating doesn't work and its a cold day it can heat up your kitchen a treat.

Then melt the butter and the milk chocolate (NOT THE WHITE CHOC) in a pan over some heat and then set aside when its all melted up.

Put the sugar, the happy eggs (happy happy!) and vanilla extract into a mixing bowl and whisk it all up. If you don't have an electric whisk it doesn't matter but I feel sorry for you because mine is so good it makes me want to whisk all day. Then whisk in your melted choc/butter. Then plop in your flour and cocoa and (it said stir here but I did some more whisking as I was having such a good time with my whisk). 

Then stir in the chunks of white chocolate and pour the mixture into a tin lined with greaseproof paper, it's nice if the tin is square. I didn't have a tin so I popped it into an oven tray - simples. Then bang it hard on the worksofa to get rid of any bubbles. 

Bake for 25 mins and then put a skewer (if you don't have a skewer, I didn't, you could use a knife or even a metal nail file) into the middle so it comes out with moist crumbs.

Then transfer to a metal cooling rack and leave to cool then chop it up and gobble it down!

Now I'm off to make some delicious banana muffins - not for my bf though otherwise his face will blow up like a balloon - and chocolate shortbread.

A Guest Blog....

 The recipe below sounded so delicious I belive it deserved a first guest blog. As soon as I make it I shall post a photo but in the meantime here is a picture of a parsnip that has been on my desk for a week...

This is by a lovely and talented lady from London...

'As someone who thought they were an inadequate Jew because they couldn't cook a good chicken soup (and not because they've never been to church, I mean synagogue), I decided I must try harder, and am now keen to share my top chicken soup tips...

1. If you use 2 chicken skeletons the stock always tastes miles better - it can otherwise be a bit disappointingly watery after all that work. I was delighted when I discovered Nigella agreed with me on this one, as she also does on the need to cook green beans till they are floppy, not al dente. Her top tip is keep one skeleton (she calls it a carcass?!) in the freezer till you have another one to add. My top tip is invite lots of people to Sunday lunch and buy two chickens.

2. If you add a chicken stock cube it always tastes much more home made (Kalo organic are the best)

3. I get a bit fed up of tarragon as everyone always think you have to use it with chicken, but also as it tastes like aniseed which I don't actually like. So a twist on your chicken soup is my new 'oriental' themed chicken soup, which I love and will share with you...it's my favourite winter meal.

Stock-making is the same, though add as many veg as poss, and also a bay leaf can be nice.

Then thinly slice (not chop) and fry a load of onions v. slowly till they are lovely and mushy. Add stock and when boiling add some or all of the following:

fried mushrooms
raw sugar snap peas (at the end so they get hot but not soggy)
chicken bits left over from skeleton OR freshly cooked chicken breast (maybe in a ridged pan so it's nice and stripey and sliced in that smart diagonal way)
noodles (I like glass noodles in this)
Thai fish sauce (strange but true, makes it taste well oriental)
spirng onions also cut on the bias
and most importantly of all, TONS of chopped coriander at the end – if you love coriander as much as I do which is a lot.

Love your blog by the way. Maybe that's because I like cooking and talking and cycling too!

Px'

This week my flat has mainly smelt of burnt pan.

Chicken, Leek, Mushroom and Tarragon Soup

In this picture, I realise that the soup looks a little bit like something that might have come out the bottom of a lake but it really is delicious.

In order to make the soup you also get to eat a roast chicken the night before - bonus!







You will need...

Some chicken taken off the skeleton of a chicken.
Munchrooms
Leeks
Fresh or dried tarragon - fresh is better but I had to use dried.
Chicken's skeleton
Carrot
Onion
Celery
Leek
Bay Leaves

O.k Firstly you have to make some stock, it's good if you have a few hours to do this.

Into a pan put your carrot, onion, celery,leek, bay leaves and chicken skeleton. Pour on about 2 pints of boiling water, add salt and pepper bring to boil and then simmer for a few hours.

While I was making my stock this week, I toddled off to type something (about food) and left my stock unattended for a little too long. When I came back all the stock had boiled away and I was left with a black STINKING pan and all black disgusting vegetables in the bottom. The pan had truly met it's maker, so I put it in a bag and left it in the hall for a bit. Its o.k because it was only about £3 from IKEA 4  years ago and the handle didn't work. So now I have a nice new green pan (not because the pan turned green, but because I bought a new one). I will use it tonight to make hollandaise sauce with.

Anyway luckily I had extra veg and bitov chicken skeleton left so I did stock number two.

When you are finished it should look something like this..

(a little bit like someone has done a wee who hasn't drunk a lot of water for a few days).

To make the soup....

Fry your leeks first, then pour on the stock and simmer for a while, 

next add some chopped up mushrooms and a dash of cornflour and simmer for a bit longer. Next add chicken and tarragon, pop the lid back on a simmer for even longer. TA DA! That is it (I think) the end.

This week I have been a little ill. I have had a chest infection - cough cough cough and also

I have had an inflamed wisdom tooth. I have a very odd dentist who makes his sentences go down at the end so much that his voice is so low on the last word that you don't know what it is.

Anyway I knew my tooth was inflamed all I wanted was the drugs to fix it. So I went in and I said Hello Mr, I think I have an inflamed wisdom tooth again, he looked in my mouth (no gloves or anything) just had a little peek and said 'you have an inflamed wisdom tooth, that's £16.50 please' I think he said please I couldn't really hear. I could be a bloomin dentist - easy peasy.

I have also bought a winter knit and some lovely red shoes. 

Scallops are soooo 'on trend'.

Scallops and pancetta with a rocket salad (and optional pasta)

On the cooking programmes everyone cooks scallops. So I thought, I will also cook scallops.

I went to the fishmonger and asked him for some scallops and whilst I was there I said to him 'please may I ask you some other fish related questions?' He looked a bit unsure but then he said 'yes'. So I asked him..

'How do I fillet a fish?'

He said 'its difficult, shane's been working here for 6 months and he still can't do it!' and then he pointed and laughed at a boy behind him, who I assume was Shane. That was the end of my questions.

Anyway to make a scallop dish you will need (for two people)

4-6 scallops
pancetta (i was forced to use bacon bits from Aldi - its fine if you  cut the fat off)
lots of onion and garlic
about 4 tablespoons of butter (i used clover it was fine)
rocket
spaghetti

This is relatively easy to make but you have to do it all at once.

Ok, firstly put your pasta onto cook.

If you're having this as a starter you don't need pasta but if you live with a hungry boy then pasta is a good accompaniment.

For the sauce chop up lots of onion and garlic, about this amount...

Then slowly sweat the onions and garlic in two tablespoons of white wine. Once the wine has mostly evaporated gradually whisk in your butter, season with a bit of black pepper and I used a tiny bit of oregano. This is your sauce. If you can't be bothered to make a sauce, just pour over some olive oil at the end innit.





In another pan fry your pancetta and then in the bacony juices fry your scallops for about 1 minute on each side. Put your pasta and rocket on a plate or bowl its up to you and then place the scallops and pancetta atop. Pour over your sauce and that is the end!!!!!

On Friday night I made a 'speed crumble'. I sent out the hunter gatherer on Thursday night for some fruit for packed lunches and he returned holding proudly aloft a bag of 'Bramley cooking apples'. After trying to eat one raw, I made faces I didn't know I was capable of (like Ron Weasley in Harry P) so I gave up and make a crumble (in 12 minutes)

Peel and chop your apples, place in a bowl and sprinkle on cinnamon and brown sugar.

Then combine 2 cups of wholemeal flour (I used self raising it was lovely) with 1.2 cups of brown sugar and two tablespoons of cinnamon.
Then slowly mix in 1 cup of butter and make the international sign for money with your fingers around the mixture. Sprinkle on top of the apples and put in the oven for 30 mins. I also just speed typed that.

It's very cold in this room. Time for some soup.

Help Needed Please!!!

One of you lovely people has suggested I enter into a Tesco Healthy Eating Recipe competition which I think I just bloody well might do! I can win £5000 worth of Tesco vouchers so all the more ingredients to put in my blog and maybe a few treats as well.

What would be really useful for me is if you could tell me which recipe you've enjoyed reading about or making, as I'm only allowed to enter one recipe. Once I've entered it, the more people that click 'like' on it on the Tesco website means the more likely I am to win. So that would be jolly good guys, either tell me on twitter/facebook or do a comment!

I'm off to Sports Direct now to buy some new gym tops! Sports Direct is a cavern of lycra where none of the staff know where anything is or in fact where they are themselves. I reckon a 5 a side team wandered in in 2007 to buy a football and never left and are now doomed to a life of strip lighting and helping fat people buy pink trousers. 

Later I shall be making scallops with pancetta and optional pasta which I will post asap.

Anyway please tell me which recipe you reckon I should enter and I will be much obliged and maybe even give you a biscuit (or a sausage, I've still got 16).

It smells like a French man's rustic kitchen.

In my freezer I have 34 sausages. This is too many sausages to have in a freezer which is only the size of a large shoebox. Some of the sausages I bought in my online shop and clicked 2 instead of 1 on the quantity amount, as I was buying a 241 deal anyway it meant I actually ordered 4 for 2 and there were 6 sausages in each pack. The other sausages I was given in return for a bran cake. As these sausages were posh and organic and the bran cake was a couple of days old and on the small side I think I definitely got the better deal, plus it made me feel like I was living in the middle ages.

So with all theses sausages knocking about (or rather packed into fours and put in little freezer bags) I decided to make a sausage casserole.

Sausage casserole

You will need

4-6 sausages depending on how big the sausages are and how many people you are feeding. (If you don't have any sausages I can lend you some, I've got load)

Carrots (as many as you like)

Courgettes (I ate courgettes nearly every day of the week last week as I bought 3 not knowing that I already had 2 - warning - too many courgettes is not positive for your bottom noises)

Munchrooms

Garlic

2 small onions

Beef stock, Red Wine, Sage - fresh or dried.

It is really super doooper easy to make. Firstly in a frying pan brown your sausages then take them out of the frying pan and leave them on a plate or a chopping board anything you like, except for maybe a dirty floor because that's not very hygenic.

Then chop up your onion, munchrooms, courgette, garlic and carrot and brown in the frying pan. Add back in the sausages (clean, not dirty) and add beef stock and a slug of red wine. Season with herbs and black pepper.  Bring to the boil and then simmer. Then transfer into a casserole pot (I did this over the sink in case of spillage, which there was quite a lot of) and then put in the oven for half an hour to forty mins  - until the carrots are soft.

Serve with a large glass of good red wine and some crusty bread. SOOOO EASY PEASY. P.s if you are a vegeeeeetarian leave out the sausages innit.

Yesterday evening I went to the Didsbury Beer Festival. Even though I didn't like beer it was NOT a problem as they had a whole stall of cider. I had some little tokens and I spent them all on different ciders - Happy Daze I would recommend highly. I think I maybe had too many of them though as I told the man behind the cider counter that he looked beefy and did he go to the gym and he went all red. He was beefy though.

I'm also still thinking about that poor old pigeon, it's the anniversary of his death today. Poor old pidge.